Friday, May 29, 2009

It's the Little Things that Count! (excerpt 'Raising Nick,' re: friendships)

Background info: Nick sitting at dining room table, coloring.

Me: That's nice. Is that for me?

Nick: No, Mom; this is for Celeste.

Me: Celeste?

Nick: Yes, mom. Look what happened: Talyana was coloring and she didn't know how to color something so Celeste helped her and when Talyana was done, she gave her paper to Jazmin.

Me: So?

Nick: Celeste was sad that Talyana didn't give it to her. She put her head down on her desk and started to cry because she was sad.

Me: I guess that wasn't so nice, huh?

Nick: No. That's why I'm coloring this for Celeste- so she is happy.

..........

Wise beyond his years, this kid. I'm amazed by the lessons I learn from him and proud that at such a young age, he already knows how to be a selfless friend.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Parenting Readiness Test

I love this every time I get it in an e-mail. The author is unknown but there's NO doubt he/she was a parent!

Mess Test
Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flowerbed from outside and rub on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Repeat. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

Toy Test

Obtain a 55-gallon box of Legos (if Legos are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (This could wake a child at night.)

Dressing Test
Obtain one large, unhappy, living octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.


Feeding Test

Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug on the floor.

Night Test
Prepare by obtaining a small cloth bag and fill it with 8 – 12 pounds of sand. Soak it thoroughly in water. At 8:00 PM begin to waltz and hum with the bag until 9:00 PM. Lay down your bag and set your alarm for 10:00 PM. Get up, pick up your bag, and sing every song you have ever heard. Make up about a dozen more and sing these too until 4:00 AM. Set alarm for 5:00 AM. Get up and make breakfast. Keep this up for 5 years. Look cheerful.

Physical Test (Women)

Obtain a large beanbag chair and attach it to the front of you clothes. Leave it there for 9 months. Now remove 10% of the beans.

Physical Test (Men)
Go to the nearest drug store. Set your wallet on the counter. Ask the clerk to help himself. Now proceed to the nearest food store. Go to the head office and arrange for your paycheck to be directly deposited to the store. Purchase a newspaper. Go home and read it quietly for the last time.

Grocery Store Test

Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

Final Assignment
Find a couple who has a small child. Lecture them on how they can improve their discipline, patience, tolerance, toilet training, and child's table manners. Suggest many ways they can improve. Emphasize to them that they should never allow their children to run riot. Enjoy this experience. It will be the last time you will have all the answers.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Before I was a Mom

Before I was a Mom, I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom, I had never been puked on.
Pooped on
Chewed on
Peed on
I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom, I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom, I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put him down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.

I never knew I would love being a Mom.


Before I was a Mom,I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom, I had never gotten up in the middle of the night
every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the JOY,
the LOVE,
the heartache,
the WONDERMENT or the satisfaction of being a Mom.
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
before I was a Mom.

Send this to someone who you think is an awesome Mom.

May you always be overwhelmed by the Grace of God rather than by the cares of life